Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Spoiler Alert: Sometimes My Baby Does Not Wear a Hat

Today I woke up with a healthy self-esteem, so I decided to go out in the world with my baby so that people could knock it out of me.  

I went to the grocery store and in the check out line my wish came true.  An elderly woman behind me said, “Oh, dear.  I hope you are going to put a hat on the darling baby before you go outside.”  I contemplated having the lady put a hat on the baby, because then she could see what it’s like when a 4 month old tries to kill you with daggers shooting from her eyes.  Evelyn is a sweetheart, but she’s 15lbs of strong willed fury.  I admitted that I was not because it only caused her to scream, which then caused her to overheat in the Bundle Me I keep her in, and then she screams worse.  The elderly lady and the check out lady shared a look that clearly stated I was one asshole of a mother.  This was sort of embarrassing because it is the same store I was in with Nora back when she was potty training and obsessed with underwear, so naturally she told the teenage bagger boy what color underwear I was wearing that day. 
A few moments later as I was trying to get out my debit card, remember my pin, keep Evie happy and contemplate whether or not I had accidentally set my keys on a shelf in the store and lost them, she apparently thought I had time on my hands to chat so she asked me if I am a “stay at home mom”.  Crap.  I was immediately annoyed that I do stay at home, knowing it would make her happy.  So I said yes, but happily told her I did not the first 3 years with my first.  She shared with me that it’s such a gift to a child to have a mother stay home.  Yeah, it is.  I am so lucky I am able to have the option. But it is an option, and if it becomes the option that does not create the right dynamic for my family- financially or mentally for me-I will choose another option.

But you know what else is a gift?  Having money to feed your kids and keep them warm in a house filled with happiness and love.  Quality time spent with your kids whether you work or not is also a gift.   It’s also cool for them to see a mom who has interests inside and outside the home. The likelihood that my girls will be able to afford to stay home when they have kids (when they are 28 and not before) isn’t the best.  I mean, it's probably going to take a two income family to pay for the maintenance those flying cars will necessitate. So I think giving them a role model for their future is also a good idea.  But screw that, what do I know.  An elderly lady I’ve never met clearly knows what’s best for my two children and all of yours. I make it a habit to not yell at old people, because some day I plan to be old and super crotchety and it’s going to be awesome.  Plus, no one is harder on each other than a group of mothers with young children- so this lady was nothing.  I did hightail it out of there before she found out I was not able to successfully breastfeed either of my children though, that may have killed her.


Speaking of working moms, how awesome is this mom?  This is truly one of the most interesting things I’ve seen in awhile.  Check out the experiments she's doing in space.


Mom in Space  


Everyone that knows me- consider what my hair would have looked like if that was me floating in space....

I would have pictured an astronaut who is a mother to be like Leonard's mother on The Big Bang Theory, but this Mom in Space is not at all similar to Leonard’s mother.  The world will be a better place because of this mother's work, and just think how proud her little boy must be of his mom.


And just for the record, that old lady can bite me.


6 comments:

Amanda M. said...

Love you! I love this post. I cannot wait to read all the others. :)

Angela said...

love reading your blogs!

Amanda said...

Thanks, girls!

Drummers said...

Amanda but a hat on that BABY! ;-)

Julie W. said...

Amen, sister! It starts the moment you look pregnant and it doesn't stop. People are way too free with their judgements disguised as "advice"! Oh, and I would LOVE to see your hair in space!

Amanda said...

That is so true, Julie. I'm not sure what causes people to think the minute someone is pregnant or a parent that every part of their body and life are up for discussion.

I think I'd have to shave my head in space.