I Survived Catholic School

Yesterday we had the opportunity to visit our daughter's new school and meet the kindergarten team.  

Nora felt a bit nervous, understandably, so when this happens she takes on some sort of goofy cartoon character persona.  I guess I would compare her, in this mode only, to those tragically brain washed children on Barney. 

This involves a lot of animated speaking and sweeping hand gestures and overly dramatic happy reactions.  In other words, it's possible they thought that Nora had been drinking before the Kindergarten Popsicle Social.

This did not last too long, although it came back a few times during the event.  But overall it was a fun and happy occasion for everyone.

My husband and I were relieved to see that we can finally start the, "You better appreciate this because I had NOTHING as a child" speeches.  We had been wondering when those could start.  So far we discipline and stay on her behavior like our parents did and we don't have enough money to buy her one of those train sets that Ricky Schroeder had going through his house in Silver Spoons.  I know you remember it too.

My parent's didn't love me this much.

So imagine our glee when we saw Smart boards in every classroom!  A playground designed specifically for the kindergarten classrooms, so they have their own space!  An entire section of the school devoted to their needs alone.


I went to 12 years of Catholic school.  So my Smart board was a projector that had to be checked out, and if two other teachers in the school were using them that day, our teacher was crap out of luck.  My playground was a parking lot that had some piddly stuff painted on it for Four Square and Hop Scotch. 


It couldn't be more than that because it was also the parking lot for the church.  Which meant when funerals were going on we had no recess, instead we were sequestered to our classrooms to play Heads Up Seven Up.  


I bet my daughters will never know the joy of slipping through a hallway because it was raining and it was leaking through the roof into our class rooms and hallways.  Then, after you fell on your head, you noticed that they addressed the leak with the ultimate in plumbing technology- the Kemp's ice cream gallon bucket.  


As much as I loved Nora's new school, and I am excited for her, I am also saddened that she will not experience a Catholic education.  


She'll never hear her cords going "RIP ROP RIP ROP RIP ROP" as she brings the gifts down the aisle for communion.  


She will never experience getting to gather in the auditorium/cafeteria/gym/etc.  room when some sort of tragedy occurs, and have adults help her find some peace amongst her fear by leading the student body in prayer.  When I remember the Space Shuttle Challenger explosion, I remember the entire school gathering in the church.  I felt safe in that small, familiar space after having felt out of control and scared as a child when the news broke.


She'll never know what it's like to be sitting on the pew during Mass, and having your BFF make you laugh so hard that in order to keep silent your shoulders are shaking with quiet laughter and then suddenly you can't hold it anymore and you make a horrible gasping noise and then your 3rd grade teacher grabs you by your arm and plunks you down next to her where you sit in fear that you will not be going out to recess and will instead by stuck washing the desks.  And you  just know that one jack ass kid totally drew in pen all over his!  Not to mention what the naughty CCD kids did to them.


She won't know what it's like to have a favorite priest that all the kids called "Padre".  You know, because we were just that cool.


She'll never own a collection of peter pan collared shirts in yellow, light blue, and white to pair with her green plaid jumper.  And she'll never know how cool it was to finally reach 6th grade, where you could trade your nerdy jumper in for a nerdy plaid skirt.

                             Perception  Vs.  Reality

Sometimes I wonder if the smart board is worth it....