Let's Get Silly

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

My Dad Bought Some New Fangled Phones

Much to the dismay of AT&T employees all over the southern states, my Dad and Stepmom bought iPhones and an iPad. This will obviously be providing endless enjoyment to everyone that comes into contact with them for the remainder of all time. Except, that is, for said AT&T employees.

Soon after their purchase, we decided to FaceTime, knowing they would love to see the grandkids via their new ringie dingies.  

The fact that these are referred to as "smart phones" should have been our first clue that our family could not pull this off.

Here's how it went down:

First, I called his phone. No answer.  

Which was weird, because we had just discussed the fact that I would be calling.

Soon I received a call from my stepmother's iPhone instead.  

My dad explained that his phone was not working.  
I asked what was wrong and he said: This damn woman keeps talking to me when she's not supposed to. 

A little probing and we figured out he meant Siri.  Apparently my father feels that Siri is mouthy and out of line.  

So we began talking.  And I began taking pictures.  

It was like walking down a cinematic road, the way he called up memories of terrifying movies.

For a long time, my dad looked like the man behind the curtain from Wizard of Oz.

Then he moved onto his Blair Witch Project impersonation with a lot of shaking of the camera and weird angles as he walked around his house while talking. 

We had long conversations with my dad's finger.

My favorite part came when we asked him if he would go out onto the balcony and show us the view of the beach.  

My dad walked out to the balcony, looked at the beach and kept his phone facing him.  
Then he said, "There, can you see it?".  

Just because you are looking at it with your eyeballs, does not mean we see it.
For my stepmom's sake, I'm hoping he grasps this a little bit better soon.  

Because when I see her this summer, I plan on teaching her how to FaceTime my Dad from another room, simply to ask him to bring her something like a slice of cheese or a tissue. Or to tell him vital celebrity gossip, like the fact that Whitney Houston died.

My husband really loves when I FaceTime him from our bedroom for that stuff.  

Just ask him.

*A small follow up: Shortly after these events took place, my dad actually traded in his phone for a less chatty version of Siri. We all know this does not exist, therefore it was simply the matter of him wearing down some poor AT&T guy that just wanted him out of the store that badly.*  


MommyLisa said...


Julie said...

I have the less chatty version of Siri.

It's called the iPhone 3.


(I'm holding out for the iPhone where other people can see what my eyeballs are seeing...oh yeah!)

Amanda M. said...

This is HILARIOUS. My dad informed me yesterday that he now has 'Skypes' on his computer so we should definitely set up a time to talk. I think it's going to be just as cool as your experience FaceTiming with your dad.

McKenna said...

Oh this is hilarious. My dad just got an iPhone and has no clue what he is doing. He is just figuring out how to text, I think facetime might put him over the edge.

Amanda said...

@Amanda- get your camera ready for The Skypes!

@Julie- I recently found up I'm eligible for a phone upgrade in November. iPhone 5 comes out in October! I'm in nerd heaven!

@Jessica- I do have to give my dad credit, he did learn how to use voice texting. BUT, when I called his phone it was obvious that the person at the phone store and created his voicemail message. Aye carumba.

Megs said...

That had laughing until I cried imagining your dad through the experience (with the help of the pictures which are even funnier. The ironic thing is that I will likely be similar to him when it's time to upgrade my phone from the stone ages of 2009. My dad has figured out how to read on his nook and now feels he has mastered everything technology can possibly throw at him. Great blog as always!

Anonymous said...

Oh god how funny! Imagine my glee when my 10 year old nokia suddenly became all hipster and cool! Then my kids lost it at the park. I have no idea how my new phone works. I just get the kids to work it for me.

Mrs. Tuna said...

I moved up to an Android this week. I feel more smarter already.

Maggie S. said...

Hilarious. I think I might be a little younger than your parents, but it will be that way when my husband and I get smart phones, if ever.

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Joanna said...

I know how you feel! It took me forever to teach my dad how to use his! But it really is useful when I’m out of town for a long period of time and I want to check on my dad and vice-versa. At least he knows how to position the screen now when he’s talking to me. :)

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